Thursday, August 31, 2006

you & me

I'm having a terrible week. I don't usually tell people that (except for Brian). I'd rather just act like everything is fine and let things go. But it's not going away yet. In fact, it's getting worse. I had a huge argument with my son the other day about him not having a job and about him getting busted for underage drinking a couple of weeks ago. The next day I called the house after school to talk to the girls and he answered the phone and hung up on me. When I came home from work he had taken his pictures out of all the picture frames and scrapbooks. I told him that he didn't respect our rules, our things or me and that he couldn't live with us anymore if he was going to act that way. He packed his things and moved out. I haven't heard anything from him since then.

Yesterday when I was looking through our old pictures, I found out that he took a bunch of those too. I'm not sure where they went but it's killing me to think that he may have destroyed them. I was looking for a specific picture of the two of us because I wanted to write down what I was feeling about everything. I didn't find it but I did find this one:

In case you can't read it, the journaling says "You can take your pictures out of all the frames and scrapbooks. You can leave the house and never call. But you'll always be my son and you'll always be in my heart. Because I'll always be your mom & I'll always love you."

As I was making this layout, I made an offhanded comment to Brian about something completely unimportant and he snapped at me and it really hurt my feelings. I know I'm extra emotional right now but so does he and I felt like...I don't know what. Like he didn't even care how exhausted and beaten I feel right now. I stormed out of the bedroom and didn't go back in until he was asleep. I hate leaving things like that between us but I really don't think I can take any more right now.

Can I have some sympathy, please?


Christine R said...

I'm sending sympathy thoughts your way. Being that age is so hard. I remember one month my mom had kicked me out. We were fighting and she felt like I should've been doing more and she kicked me out..I acted happy to leave but really wasn't. I wanted back in. I did go back on my own. It's so hard figuring out what your supposed to be at that age! I'm still a little unsure! I hope all goes well and he comes home safe and sound and figures things out with your pictures of course! Hang in there..he'll get older!

Christine R said...

was so caught up i forgot to tell you how great your layout it and the journaling...oi! So true!

Brittany's Corner said...

layout is sorry for your troubles. i feel your pain. my mom kicked me out once, and i deserved it!!!! i look back and regret some stuff i did while living at home, but i do remeber how much i loved (still love) my mom. your son is in a place, and remember his love for you will be there when he comes back around!!! he is still growing and finding himself. you hold strong to what you feel is the right thing to are a great mom and did nothing wrong!!!

Michelle said...

Thanks, guys. You're so sweet! Your sympathy is making me cry.